Change your perspective when things go wrong!

July 12, 2010
posted by Admin

Jeff’s blog

          Recently I had something terrible happen!  I woke up one morning and found that I had two tires slashed and the front fender keyed.  I was very angry and upset that someone would destroy my beloved car and rock my safety and security.  The anger helped to motivate me to call the necessary people and do the necessary things to fix the situation.  After several hours of being angry I came to realize that the anger was no longer useful.  It was keeping me tense.  I realized that I was stressed to the max, as I waited for my car to be fixed.  I started to do “PERT” (a visualization exercise that I learned at the forgiveness workshop I attended recently).    I closed my eyes breathed into my belly and placed a happy image in my brain.  As a result, I felt more relaxed.  I found myself thankful that things were not worse!   After all, someone could have slashed all four tires or could have stolen my car!  I found myself feeling grateful that I had the money to fix my car.  While what happened was not okay, I would be okay, and my life would go on.

          Days later, I started to think about how my safety and security was not what I thought it was.  I found myself feeling randomly scared as I went through my day.  I would walk outside and look to see if my tires were still inflated.  I worried needlessly about whether the person would come back and finish off the other two tires.  I came to realize that it was no longer about my “tires,” but my perspective on the world.  I was not living in a world of safety….where I could park my car outside of my apartment and it would be fine.  Now, I lived in a world where I could wake up to my car being vandalized!  This thinking process made me evaluate the safety of my present living situation.  Besides changing the way I saw this incident, I wanted to change my living environment!  This is something that I can and will change.  I can change where I live, and while I am in the process of changing my living environment, I can put things into perspective.  My car was vandalized once, and what would be the chances that my car would be vandalized again? 

          For me the process of forgiveness is working to change my perspective on life and events.  It’s looking at a situation differently.  I am slowly letting go of the outrage I feel about this situation and believe it or not, I am sending positive thoughts to the person who vandalized my car!  It has also helped me look at the world I live in and realize that bad things happen to good people all the time.

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